ღ refer to the list above for active muses. ღ post "calling" one of them out — you can do so by putting their name in the subject line! ღ feel free to make up a scenario at the start, or wait to see where things go.
[fashionably late wasn't really part of her action plan today, but there was something really important that Roxy needed to do — rather, there was something really important that Roxy needed to put together and bring to the park. sorry about that!]
[she's just gonna rest her chin on her arms on the back of the bench for now. aw, did he fall asleep? it's hard to tell, she should test the waters.]
[It's easy to recognize her voice and his eyes immediately open, staring up at her before there's a grin. He doesn't quite sit up yet but he visibly brightens upon seeing her.]
Hey, you made it! [He doesn't even seem to mind that she's a little later than they'd agreed.] How's it going?
Better now, I think. [He's always happier when he's with other people and it's then that he finally sits up. He stays sideways on the bench, turning his head to face her instead.] Don't worry about the time or anything though, I wasn't really keeping track of it either. You arrived when you were supposed to. [Like a wizard. On the other hand...]
Oh, you know! Shenanigans. [she holds that thought for a moment, then, in what is probably the most graceful move she will ever pull off, hops over the back of the bench and settles down next to him.]
[Roxy won't be coy about the shenanigans, though — just like she isn't going to let the fact that he said "better now" float on by without her acknowledging it at some point. but first:]
Actually, Dave told me a while back you're into hacking. I thought it might be fun if the two of us got into some mischief.
[have you ever seen a girl christen a park bench with a bottle like it's a brand new ship in order to retrieve the two laptops stored inside? now you have. Roxy's sylladex is stupid.]
[That was actually impressive? He even gives a polite little golf clap in reply before he gives his full attention to the conversation. "Mischief" catches his attention and he's about to ask a question before Roxy suddenly breaks the wine bottle. He jumps lightly but at the sight of the laptops he immediately gets it.
Why are sylladexes so weird? Questions for the ages.]
Sounds like a pretty good way to spend an afternoon. [He's just hoping that Dave didn't tell Roxy how "good" he was at hacking. Even so he's already reaching for one of the laptops.] What were you thinking?
[if she remembers correctly, he said something like, "i think he pretty much sucked at his codes." sorry dude. but that's cool, Roxy once held the title of "leetest haxxer in all of human civilization (population: 2)," and she is more than willing to offer some pointers, if he wants them.]
You wanna play a prank on someone? Nothin' malicious or anything — just something silly to make 'em say, "God damn, my bits and bytes just got owned."
Uh, yes? You are talking to the pranking master here, Roxy. I would have to be incredibly lame not to use my hacker cred to its full potential. [Which means doing something goofy.] Quick, what's the most annoying thing you can think of that would happen when you open a program?
Annoying, huh? Hmmm ... I guess that sorta depends on the unlucky — nah, wait, I definitely mean lucky — chump we're about to prank.
[one time she sent Dirk an exe that changed all his unnamed folders to "named folder" and "meow." and even though she is capable of blowing up computers, it is definitely too far on the malicious end of the spectrum, poor Jane.]
But if we're talkin' about general annoyance? That'd have to be Party Mode. [what she means by Party Mode, though, she doesn't clarify immediately — but she does open her laptop, intent on showing him.]
Party mode sounds pretty appropriate for what I'm thinking of. Things that take over the whole screen, the works. [But Roxy's moving and instead of focusing on the laptop in her hands instead of the one he's holding onto. Instead, he's also scooting a bit closer so he can look at her screen over her shoulder.]
You're in luck, then, John! Because that's pretty much exactly how it works — and you can change up anything in it to best suit your target.
[here, she'll move the laptop so it's settled between the two of them. she's opened a folder that contains two executables: one of them labeled PARTYMODE.EXE, one of them labeled PARTYPOOPER.EXE.]
[u know what 2 do, John! launching Party Mode briefly blacks out the screen entirely, then, after the program hides all the desktop icons, menus and other important items that are unnecessary for PARTYING, it turns the entire screen into a desktop equivalent of this. occasionally, confetti explodes across the screen.]
[clicking anywhere on the screen (the pointer's been changed to nyan cat, for good measure) will load another cat. any attempts to reboot the computer or access any other files will result in a dialogue message: where u goin? the partys just started! <3]
[there's exactly one way to turn off Party Mode, and that's to locate the folder the executables were in again. for the purposes of this demonstration, it's sitting in the bottom right corner of the screen.]
[Give him a second to launch the first executable and as soon as the cat appears he starts laughing. He's busy playing around with it, watching nyan cat dart around the screen before he zips to the original folder and runs the second executable and resuming the computer to its original status.]
Nice. The reboot mechanic is a nice touch, too. Think we could also stick the folder inside another folder for hard mode?
Oooh, who knew Johnny Windsock had such a nefarious streak? [but she says that with a playful sort of nudge, an affirmation to his question. she is completely on board with making Party Mode just a bit harder to crack.]
So who are you thinkin' of sending this Egbert-brand, Egbert-approved party to?
[There's a satisfied grin then.] I take my pranks very seriously. Very, very seriously. And it's going to Karkat, duh. He would be the perfect recipient for this kind of thing.
Oh man, I can hear Shouty getting his shout on already.
[here, she'll send the appropriate files on over to John's laptop — they are pretty straightforward codeways, but she's also curious to see what he can do. plus, the more people messing with Party Mode the better; that's how it becomes more versatile. and annoying.]
[John might not be nearly as skilled as she is (like. Very Very far from it, actually) but once he has the files he's busy working on adding a couple of features himself. Namely, every time the confetti showers over the screen there will now be an accompanying noise file that sounds like one of those party favor horns and a clip of the nyan cat song will play when the cat-cursor moves across the screen. Everything's tidied back up and saved in the files before writing something in PARTYPOOPER.EXE and saving the whole thing.]
Sounds about right for him. The good thing is that he is way over there and I am here and there's no proof we did anything. With the added sound files and making the deactivating file a hidden file this will either take him all day, make him go to Sollux or both. That's good enough for me.
[Roxy had been watching him work, and once he's finished, she gives the most approving of nods.]
Not bad, not bad at all. Are you gonna try to hide the file when you send it to him, or go ahead and drop it on him? I can't say I know the guy all that well, but he strikes me as the type who'll open anything you give him.
[she pauses there, something seemingly occurring to her.]
Oh! When you're done with that, I've got somethin' else I wanna show you.
I don't know, maybe he's learned to look at stuff before he clicks it but somehow I actually doubt that so yeah, I will just drop it to him. [But he stops in his tracks anyway and gives her another curious look.]
It's just some other coding I've been working on! I wanted to get some fresh eyes on it, if you're cool with that — though, it might be easier if I sent it to you first.
[this ... may sound suspiciously like bait. is John gonna take it?]
[oh what a grave mistake John has made — hahaha, nah, Roxy wouldn't actually do anything completely malicious to him, not even if he deserved it, or if it was somehow for his own good. he's the only one around here who truly gets her, in a way. how it feels to lose absolutely everything. it may never actually come up again, but there's always a sort of morbid comfort in that. it's not just something she made up. it's something they experienced together, awful as it was.]
[so, her only intention with this program here is to get a smile out of him. when he runs it, the laptop screen turns white, and the following message pops up:]
hi there!!! its ya boi john egbot lmao jk im still in early testing phases but im what you might call a 'funny shit algorithm' type whatever u want and i will tell u a joke or even do a trick no srsly go ahead and try _
[Roxy oh my god. Well, he runs the program and when the pop-up appears he...immediately starts cracking up. It's hard to say if it's because of the little graphic or because he thinks "egbot" is absolutely hilarious, but mission accomplished.]
A funny shit algorithm. This is perfect. [...for...what...but either way he immediately moves and his fingers fly over keys to type.]
ok! hit me with your best joke. we have to make sure your humor is top-notch.
[after a few seconds, a tiny wall of text and a video load onto the screen. it appears that Roxy has enlisted the help of their friends, and fed the jokes they gave her into the database the algorithm analyzes.]
so let me get this straight youre going to take whatever jokes or dumb shenanigans we all give you and feed it to a program like some sort of coding zookeeper until it becomes this shambling and groaning eldritch chimera of all our questionable senses of humor i mean im not against the idea just tryin to get a clear picture of it in my head plus im pretty sure sassing your mom is actually against the law isnt that how kids wind up eating soap or something for being potty mouthed smack talking little shits wait fuck thats basically me isnt it sorry mom youre gonna edit these things before you feed it to the code monster right right roxy hey hey mom
[sorry, Dave, this is a "funny shit" algorithm, and Roxy found that shit hilarious, so into the database it goes. anyways, his actual joke submission starts to play automatically — it is basically a Strider version of this.]
[and finally, underneath that monstrosity are two command options:]
hit '1' to rate this joke hit '2' to submit some funny shit of ur own ;)
[Well. He's mostly laughing because yeah, Dave totally being unaware and a huge dork is still funny and he's just...watching the video. This is a travesty. This whole thing is a total travesty and yet he's not even remotely surprised.]
I cannot believe this but at the same time I can. [He'll just hit "1" for now.] Roxy, this is awesome.
[Roxy's expression while she watches that video before them is somewhere between incredibly amused and "oh god I'm related to that." but she has a big smile on her face by the end; she's so chuffed that John likes it.]
[the screen changes to the rating system — John can pick a rating between 1 and 5. don't want to get too complicated, or it'll get overloaded the more jokes they add.]
I'm glad you like it! To be honest ... this was gonna be part of your birthday gift later on, but I kind of felt like you needed your eyes on it now.
["because you seemed a bit down" goes unsaid, but the thought is there, if he's able to spot it.]
Besides, this wouldn't be a proper John Egbot without a few jokes from the eponymous man himself.
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hell yes!
[she's just gonna rest her chin on her arms on the back of the bench for now. aw, did he fall asleep? it's hard to tell, she should test the waters.]
Sup.
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Hey, you made it! [He doesn't even seem to mind that she's a little later than they'd agreed.] How's it going?
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Pretty friggin spectacular — just sorry that I can't keep time for shit. How about yourself?
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What kept you?
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[Roxy won't be coy about the shenanigans, though — just like she isn't going to let the fact that he said "better now" float on by without her acknowledging it at some point. but first:]
Actually, Dave told me a while back you're into hacking. I thought it might be fun if the two of us got into some mischief.
[have you ever seen a girl christen a park bench with a bottle like it's a brand new ship in order to retrieve the two laptops stored inside? now you have. Roxy's sylladex is stupid.]
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Why are sylladexes so weird? Questions for the ages.]
Sounds like a pretty good way to spend an afternoon. [He's just hoping that Dave didn't tell Roxy how "good" he was at hacking. Even so he's already reaching for one of the laptops.] What were you thinking?
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You wanna play a prank on someone? Nothin' malicious or anything — just something silly to make 'em say, "God damn, my bits and bytes just got owned."
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[one time she sent Dirk an exe that changed all his unnamed folders to "named folder" and "meow." and even though she is capable of blowing up computers, it is definitely too far on the malicious end of the spectrum, poor Jane.]
But if we're talkin' about general annoyance? That'd have to be Party Mode. [what she means by Party Mode, though, she doesn't clarify immediately — but she does open her laptop, intent on showing him.]
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How does it work?
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[here, she'll move the laptop so it's settled between the two of them. she's opened a folder that contains two executables: one of them labeled PARTYMODE.EXE, one of them labeled PARTYPOOPER.EXE.]
[u know what 2 do, John! launching Party Mode briefly blacks out the screen entirely, then, after the program hides all the desktop icons, menus and other important items that are unnecessary for PARTYING, it turns the entire screen into a desktop equivalent of this. occasionally, confetti explodes across the screen.]
[clicking anywhere on the screen (the pointer's been changed to nyan cat, for good measure) will load another cat. any attempts to reboot the computer or access any other files will result in a dialogue message: where u goin? the partys just started! <3]
[there's exactly one way to turn off Party Mode, and that's to locate the folder the executables were in again. for the purposes of this demonstration, it's sitting in the bottom right corner of the screen.]
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Nice. The reboot mechanic is a nice touch, too. Think we could also stick the folder inside another folder for hard mode?
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So who are you thinkin' of sending this Egbert-brand, Egbert-approved party to?
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[here, she'll send the appropriate files on over to John's laptop — they are pretty straightforward codeways, but she's also curious to see what he can do. plus, the more people messing with Party Mode the better; that's how it becomes more versatile. and annoying.]
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Sounds about right for him. The good thing is that he is way over there and I am here and there's no proof we did anything. With the added sound files and making the deactivating file a hidden file this will either take him all day, make him go to Sollux or both. That's good enough for me.
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Not bad, not bad at all. Are you gonna try to hide the file when you send it to him, or go ahead and drop it on him? I can't say I know the guy all that well, but he strikes me as the type who'll open anything you give him.
[she pauses there, something seemingly occurring to her.]
Oh! When you're done with that, I've got somethin' else I wanna show you.
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What's the other thing?
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[this ... may sound suspiciously like bait. is John gonna take it?]
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Sure, why not? I doubt it can be that bad so send it to me.
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[so, her only intention with this program here is to get a smile out of him. when he runs it, the laptop screen turns white, and the following message pops up:]
hi there!!!
its ya boi john egbot
lmao jk
im still in early testing phases
but im what you might call a 'funny shit algorithm'
type whatever u want and i will tell u a joke
or even do a trick
no srsly go ahead and try
_
[what will John do?]
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A funny shit algorithm. This is perfect. [...for...what...but either way he immediately moves and his fingers fly over keys to type.]
ok! hit me with your best joke. we have to make sure your humor is top-notch.
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[after a few seconds, a tiny wall of text and a video load onto the screen. it appears that Roxy has enlisted the help of their friends, and fed the jokes they gave her into the database the algorithm analyzes.]
so let me get this straight
youre going to take whatever jokes or dumb shenanigans we all give you and feed it to a program
like some sort of coding zookeeper
until it becomes this shambling and groaning eldritch chimera of all our questionable senses of humor
i mean im not against the idea
just tryin to get a clear picture of it in my head
plus im pretty sure sassing your mom is actually against the law
isnt that how kids wind up eating soap or something
for being potty mouthed smack talking little shits
wait fuck
thats basically me isnt it
sorry mom
youre gonna edit these things before you feed it to the code monster right
right roxy
hey
hey mom
[sorry, Dave, this is a "funny shit" algorithm, and Roxy found that shit hilarious, so into the database it goes. anyways, his actual joke submission starts to play automatically — it is basically a Strider version of this.]
[and finally, underneath that monstrosity are two command options:]
hit '1' to rate this joke
hit '2' to submit some funny shit of ur own ;)
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I cannot believe this but at the same time I can. [He'll just hit "1" for now.] Roxy, this is awesome.
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[the screen changes to the rating system — John can pick a rating between 1 and 5. don't want to get too complicated, or it'll get overloaded the more jokes they add.]
I'm glad you like it! To be honest ... this was gonna be part of your birthday gift later on, but I kind of felt like you needed your eyes on it now.
["because you seemed a bit down" goes unsaid, but the thought is there, if he's able to spot it.]
Besides, this wouldn't be a proper John Egbot without a few jokes from the eponymous man himself.
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